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Here's the deal:
Women aren't usually romantically attracted to "nice" guys. Women
are attracted to men who are funny, confident, and mysterious. Good
looks don't hurt, but if you're not 6'4" tall and model-handsome,
then you have to learn how to attract women with your personality.
And being "nice" isn't going to do it for you.
Awhile back, I mentioned an interesting book that was written about
the band "Motley Crue". Remember those guys?
Well, the book is called "The Dirt: Confessions of the Worlds Most
Notorious Rock Band." As I read through that book, I realized that
these guys have dated more of the world's most attractive women than
anyone (except maybe Hugh Hefner).
In case you didn't know, the guys in Motley Crue are not very
"nice". They're famous for taking every drug known to man, beating
their women, fighting, and having a lot of people die around them.
Now, the first thing most guys say is "Yea, but they're rich and
famous..."
And this is true, they are rich and famous. But, and it's a BIG
ONE... all of the women that they have dated, married, and beaten up
are ALSO RICH AND FAMOUS TOO!
These are supermodels and playmates of the year and such. These
women can date whoever they want. Tommy Lee was MARRIED to both
Heather Locklear AND Pamela Anderson... remember?
These women didn't need Tommy Lee for his money or his fame...
they're dating these guys for some OTHER REASON!
Are you with me on this?
So what's going on
here? And more importantly, how can you use this information to be
more successful with women and dating?
First of all, don't go out and start taking drugs and beating up
your dates. I mean, I know that an occasional woman will drive a man
to drink, but I don't recommend going "Motley Crue" on a girl... lol.
The first chapter of my book "Double Your Dating" is called "Women
Don't Make Sense". Here's what I mean...
I believe:
1) Women make decisions very, very quickly about whether a man is
going to be "just a friend" or if he has romantic potential, and
once her decision is made, it's probably going to stay made.
2) These decisions are made "unconsciously", meaning that women make
all of them quickly and at a "gut level".
3) If you know how, you make her feel attraction feelings rather
than "friend" feelings.
4) The way to do it is to stop acting "nice" and start acting,
well... something else... and I don't mean "not nice".
So what DOES attract women? And how do you do it exactly?
Good questions...
At the beginning, I mentioned three qualities: Funny, Confident, and
Mysterious.
Before I talk about each, I first have to remind you that WOMEN
DON'T USUALLY MAKE SENSE. Remember that.
Here's a good metaphor: Remember when you learned to drive? It all
made sense... turn the wheel left and go left, turn it right and go
right...
But do you remember when you learned to back up? Backing up is a
whole new game. Everything that used to work now works in a
different way. At first you feel disoriented. Turn the wheel left
and go right... and you have to learn how to maneuver with the back
wheels staying straight while the front wheels turn... all with your
head turned around.
For most people, this takes some time and practice. But once you
"get it" then you can do it anytime you want.
Well, women are very similar. At first it's very confusing. You have
to try things that don't seem to make sense. But once you get the
hang of it, then you see how it works and can make it work... just
like backing up a car.
As much as many women would hate to admit it, there's something very
attractive about a man who is just a little more confident than he
should be. And if you combine this with the right amount of humor,
you have a magic combination that will charm almost any woman.
Here are a few ways to use this idea:
1) When you first meet a woman, tease her about something. It
doesn't what it is, as long as you do it early on. For instance, you
might say: "So what's with the big purse? Are you carrying a gun in
there?" or maybe "Those are some pretty tall shoes, what are you
like 4' tall without them?" If you tease a woman, it shows that
you're not intimidated by her, and that you have a fun sense of
humor. Key: Make sure you say something FUNNY. If you don't know how
to be funny, get a book on it. The test: If she's not laughing, then
it wasn't funny!
2) Look around at other things and seem kind of pre-occupied when
you first start talking to her. Make your funny remarks with a
carefree, detached tone. You want to sound like you're talking to
your best friend. Attractive women are approached all the time. It's
not attractive to a woman when you look like you've just met
Madonna. This "just a little too confident" attitude is very
attractive to women... especially when it's combined with humor.
3) Don't answer her questions directly. Women love to ask questions
like: "What do you do?" and "Where do you live?" and "Tell me about
your family". Answer with funny answers, and don't give her what she
wants. Most guys say "Oh, I'm an engineer" or "I'm a stock broker".
BORING, BORING. If she asks what you do, say "Oh, funny you should
ask. I'm a Calvin Klein Underwear Model... What do you do?..." (This
is especially funny if it's OBVIOUS that you are NOT a model) Do you
get it? Keep it up and keep her laughing.
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